Ed Morello inspired this week’s email as our comedy advisor, when he told me about this…
There was a story about a guy in the States who was diagnosed with multi personality disorder. He had 7 separate identities. 6 were upstanding citizens. The 7th was a violent alcoholic (well we all have those days!). The 6 nice personalities hired a lawyer to sue the 7th for ruining their lives. If they won their case their insurance company had to pay out $750,000. The only problem was all 7 of them had a shared bank account so the 7th guy spent the money getting drunk.
Other silly court cases:
Chamberlain Group vs Skylink Technologies – Chamerlain Group, the garage door makers sued their rivals for making remote controls that could open any garage door. They argued that it was illegal for Skylink to design something which could access their computer program to make doors open sesame. So they wanted people to locked out of their garages unless they buy a big ole expensive Chamberlain remote – luckily for people like me they lost the case. I lost my remote control for my stereo for three years – then it turned up in my grandpa’s trunk. Woo – now I can play stuff on random again and turn off the turbo base. _ imagine not being able to get into my garage…not that I have one…or a car….or a house sniff.
Ace Ventura Jr: Pet Detective
In District of Columbia Judge Roy Pearson filed a lawsuit against his neighbourhood dry cleaner over a misplaced pair of trousers. The original alteration work on the pants was $10.50. According to court papers, Pearson claims he deserves $65 million under the District’s consumer protection law that provides for damages of $1,500 per violation per day. Pearson says he deserves millions for the more than 1,000 hours spent to represent himself in the battle, for his litigation costs, for “mental suffering, inconvenience and discomfort,” for leasing a car every weekend for 10 years (what’s that for – driving to another dry cleaners??), and for a replacement suit.
Silly silly man – he must enjoy suffering, really.
Taxpayers were left with a £10,000 bill after a council took a farmer to court — claiming his pigs scratched their BUMS on protected trees. David Sunderland had been summonsed for wilfully damaging the beech trees in a field which housed 80 of his rare British Saddle pigs.
Council inspectors said bark was dislodged on 22 trees. But a tree specialist argued the damage happened before the pigs were in the field. Bradford council withdrew its prosecution at the last minute and the case was struck out. David was awarded £4,500 towards court costs and reckons the council faced a similar bill. He said: “It was a total waste of money.” One council member said: “It’s an odd thing to go to court for.”
WHY?
Marcy Meckler. While shopping at a mall, Meckler stepped outside and was “attacked” by a squirrel that lived among the trees and bushes. And “while frantically attempting to escape from the squirrel and detach it from her leg, [Meckler] fell and suffered severe injuries,” her resulting lawsuit says. That’s the mall’s fault, the lawsuit claims, demanding in excess of $50,000, based on the mall’s “failure to warn” her that squirrels live outside.
I’m rather scared now.
Anna Karenina ipod Odd bits:
Bathory dvdrip Cheerleaders in Pennsylvania fought a ban on dangerous cheerleading stunts.
Doomsday psp I Can’t Think Straight
A camel named Bert was accepted as Reserve Deputy Sheriff for the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department San Dimas California.
The most stolen painting is the Rembrandt painting of Jacob III de Cheyn. It has been stolen four times and has each time been anonymously returned.
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2 Responses to “Loony Lawsuits”
Posted: May 17th, 2007 at 10:16 am
There is a story of a guy who went into a Las Vegas casino and walks up to one of the Roulette tables. Instead of betting he sits down and observes for a bit. Finally after one spin of the wheel he groans and hands the croupier $100. She says ‘Sir, you didn’t place a bet’,
‘No’ he says ‘but I placed an imaginary bet in my head, it didn’t come in, so heres my money’.
The croupier thinking he is a bit strange accepts the $100. She spins the wheel again and when it stops the man groans and hands over $100.
‘Sir, you don’t need to pay me if you don’t lay a bet’,
‘No, no’ says the man ‘its only fair, I put an imaginary bet on black 18 and it didn’t come in so heres my money’.
Again the croupier accepts the money and continues to do so when he loses on the next 3 spins of the wheel. However on the 4th spin it lands on red 17 and the man starts jumping up and down and whooping and hugging the gamblers around him. The croupier asks him why he is so happy.
‘I won, red 17, I put $1,000 on red 17, I won!’.
‘Sir, you didn’t place a bet’,
‘Yes I did, in my head, I put down a $1,000 on red 17’.
The croupier refuses to pay out and calls the pit boss who agrees with her, as does the casino boss when he is called down. The man ends up taking the casino to court to get the $35,000 he believes he won.
After hearing all of the evidence presented the judge ruled in favour of the gambler saying that if the casino was willing to accept his money when he lost an imaginary bet, they must pay out when he won an imaginary bet.
However the judge also ruled that the casino was allowed to pay with an imaginary cheque.
Posted: Jul 2nd, 2008 at 11:47 pm
That squirrel story was just crazy. Unless this lady lived in a country that doesn’t have squirrels then maybe she could make a claim, but, I doubt that’s the case. Also since when do squirrels attack and cling onto your leg? I thought the worst they could do was bite and give you rabies.
I really wonder how many of these frivolous cases are thrown out of court, and all legal costs thrown back at the claimant. serves them right, i say.