At my primary school we had this headmaster called Mr Mather who was well into his May Pole dancing. Every year he used to get out his accordion and each class in the school would have a go at careering in between each other directed by his megaphone! Swinging off the brightly coloured ribbons- often crashing shoulders and making irrevocable knots where there was supposed to be an intricate pattern. Each dance had a name like ‘hop skipping barley’ or ‘double ducking maid’s hat’…

The May Pole and other May Day traditions (like ‘Morris men’: hankies and sticks and bells) Wikipedia says marks the end of uncomfortable winter- So, watch out! This is where it all begins oh lovely launderers. Even as I write this the rain is slashing down, but from tomorrow- which will be today as you read this- we can expect a stonking start to summer sunshine, and maybe the odd spot of rioting down near Downing Street- that’s the forecast from wikipedia anyway.

Well, apparently (as all the best British festivities seem to be) May Day comes from a pagan tradition celebrating spring and fertility. But the May Pole itself is of Germanic descent. In Britain the May Pole would be dressed with flowers and greenery (to make it look pretty), they mainly went up in villages between which there was apparently a competitive edge to the length of pole. London was fairly May Pole free until the 1660s when they started cropping up everywhere, and the similar ‘who’s got the biggest pole’ jibe persisted with silly effects. The tallest was near the church in Aldwych and it was so tall it got blown over by a ‘high wind’- what would the planners say today?!

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